Plain stupidity...

I just never learn....

The old flame came back...the intimate moments were there again...and so I thought..

My chest stiffen, I was in a daze...my heart pounded like I was on the verge of a heart attack...I couldn't breathe...My whole world collapsed and there was nothing I could do...I wept inside...I died the second time around...It was hell....

I told myself I wouldn't take her back...but it seemed there was a bigger part of me who kept on saying I felt otherwise...then the weaker part of me succumbed to the temptation of risking it all...and I lost....

I love her still...despite the things that I resolved I will not do anymore...Love conquers all...even your grasp of reality...

She told me before it was all over...but despite that I kept on hoping she'd come back...and she did, after all my stubborness swayed her to be back...but now I realized you cannot force someone to love you back the same way you love her...stupid old me!

Love sucks!

The lies, the grueling part of waiting for her text messages, the longing to be with her, the agony of not being with her, the stupid excuses, the bonds broken, the friendships put on stake, the sleepless nights, the unreplied sweet messages, the exhausting effort of reminding her how much you love her...all these that ended with nothing, with heartaches, with people suffering...stupid old me!

You know I love you...you know the rules...I wasn't lying...I can't be with you that day...I was sick...I have problems which I didn't tell you 'coz those don't concern you...you should've understood...I took you for granted...stupid old me!


Now its really over...I know...You have spoken...You have decided...You have spilled out everything inside you...It hurts...But I should have expected it...But I kept on denying myself reality...Stupid old me!

Live your life well...Find someone whom you deserve...Forget me...I am nothing...I am not worthy of your time and affection...I am just me..stupid old me!